truly disappointed.
truly upset.
i guess thats it.its no longer the same isnt it?
feeling really confused.mixture of lots of diff feelings i guess.
im angry,mad,upset,sad,lost,worried,scared...
aiyah.forget it then.AHH! =(
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
A DAY IN IJ =)
well.today was pretty productive.VERY PRODUCTIVE AS COMPARED TO MY NORMAL DAYS.it was my first time thr.honestly,i din even know whr IJ is until today.hahas.the school looks kinda nice ba.very new.
i din wanna stay at hm,thats why i asked reagen out.but cos he had consultation,so i suggested going IJ with him.he asked me to ask jack along.AND I DID.(yes.dun be surprised.im pretty fine with him now alr.thats why i can treat him normally now.BUT IT DOESNT MEAN THAT U GUYS CAN START TEASING ME AGN.cos it really irritates me alot.) studied in jack's class.with a few of his classmates ard.THATS HOW I FOUND OUT ABT ANDRE'S SECRET! that boy! ah! how can he not tell us abt it? friends for 4 yrs alr! argh!
reagen went for consultation for the first few hrs.left me and him with his classmates.LUCKILY IT DIN FEEL TOO AWKWARD.if not i really dunno wad to do.i feel apologetic.but i dun wanna mention abt the past anymore when things are much better now alr.really confused.
AND U KNOW WAD? THERE ARE REALLY ALOT OF PHS PPL THR! when we were having lunch in the canteen,we saw a few.then reagen decided to hold a PHS gathering.he called for any PHS ppl he saw and got them to come to our table.our table was flooded! CANT BLAME ME FOR BEING TOO POPULAR! hahas.i saw anet,saman,janelle,winnie,joel,melson,sherjie and phebe and many many juniors.had so much fun seeing them agn=) oh.and i nv realised that i knew so many friends who were different.this is really cool.reagen said that i was lucky that i wasnt one of them.hahas.
as usual,with reagen ard,we kept fighting.and he's REALLY DISTURBING AND ANNOYING TO THE MAX.hahas.i miss those times when we organised and ran camps tgt.so many HPT ppl thr! im a little excited abt trng camp in dec! love them lots too.no matter how much others change,i know i can still rely on them when im down.ah!
with so many familiar faces,i felt very cosy thr.there was no suspicion,nth to make me feel uneasy.today's such a nice day.not transparent,not forgotten,not neglected=)
i got lots to say! when will u be free???
i din wanna stay at hm,thats why i asked reagen out.but cos he had consultation,so i suggested going IJ with him.he asked me to ask jack along.AND I DID.(yes.dun be surprised.im pretty fine with him now alr.thats why i can treat him normally now.BUT IT DOESNT MEAN THAT U GUYS CAN START TEASING ME AGN.cos it really irritates me alot.) studied in jack's class.with a few of his classmates ard.THATS HOW I FOUND OUT ABT ANDRE'S SECRET! that boy! ah! how can he not tell us abt it? friends for 4 yrs alr! argh!
reagen went for consultation for the first few hrs.left me and him with his classmates.LUCKILY IT DIN FEEL TOO AWKWARD.if not i really dunno wad to do.i feel apologetic.but i dun wanna mention abt the past anymore when things are much better now alr.really confused.
AND U KNOW WAD? THERE ARE REALLY ALOT OF PHS PPL THR! when we were having lunch in the canteen,we saw a few.then reagen decided to hold a PHS gathering.he called for any PHS ppl he saw and got them to come to our table.our table was flooded! CANT BLAME ME FOR BEING TOO POPULAR! hahas.i saw anet,saman,janelle,winnie,joel,melson,sherjie and phebe and many many juniors.had so much fun seeing them agn=) oh.and i nv realised that i knew so many friends who were different.this is really cool.reagen said that i was lucky that i wasnt one of them.hahas.
as usual,with reagen ard,we kept fighting.and he's REALLY DISTURBING AND ANNOYING TO THE MAX.hahas.i miss those times when we organised and ran camps tgt.so many HPT ppl thr! im a little excited abt trng camp in dec! love them lots too.no matter how much others change,i know i can still rely on them when im down.ah!
with so many familiar faces,i felt very cosy thr.there was no suspicion,nth to make me feel uneasy.today's such a nice day.not transparent,not forgotten,not neglected=)
i got lots to say! when will u be free???
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
The dawn is breaking
A light shining through
You're barely waking
And I'm tangled up in you
Yeah
I'm open, you're closed
Where I follow, you'll go
I worry I won't see your face
Light up again
Even the best fall down sometimes
Even the wrong words seem to rhyme
Out of the doubt that fills my mind
I somehow find
You and I collide
I'm quiet you know
You make a first impression
I've found I'm scared to know I'm always on your mind
Even the best fall down sometimes
Even the stars refuse to shine
Out of the back you fall in time
I somehow find
You and I collide
Don't stop here
I've lost my place
I'm close behind
Even the best fall down sometimes
Even the wrong words seem to ryhme
Out of the doubt that fills your mind
You finally find
You and I collide
You finally find
You and I collide
You finally find
You and I collide
isnt it just totally awesome that we get to know many different ppl in different stages of our lives and how dear they all turn out to be? graduation day always brings back many wonderful and precious memories.many many.
i can still rmb the day when i graduated from kindergarten.i rmb how mdm fatimah cried with my class.
and the day when i graduated from primary school.though im not exactly in touch with my friends now,but we'll still rmb each other and say hi when we meet each other.
i can still rmb graduating from PHS.the phototaking sessions and service..and my pals who are still standing close by me now.
well.WOW! 2 yrs in TJ is gone just like that.these 2 yrs seemed to pass really fast.though short,im still really touched to have known a great bunch of friends.they're just simply wonderful cos i wouldnt have enjoyed my time in school if its not for them.
simply love my teammates, classmates and my beloved clique lots and lots=)
oh dear.im already missing everyone.missing all the times spent with the team and class.it got me thinking if anyone will still think of me a few yrs down the road.i'll always try to bring joy to others..and i wonder if anyone will rmb me and miss me for that.hahas.actually i doubt so.thats why i was pretty upset that day.but nvm lah.i guess all good things will eventually come to an end.including wonderful friendships=( well.sometimes when i say im fine,i really wish that someone would look me in the eyes and ask me to tell the truth.
my brother can come out each sunday from now on.last sunday,i spent the whole day with my siblings.for the very first time,without our parents ard.went to buy stuffs for my brother and had KFC tgt.terence has grown alot.he's even taller than me now and his voice has changed too.we talked abt many things that we've nv talked abt before.and i was imagining how touched my parents would feel looking at us,cos we've all grown up alr.shamane kept talking abt her boyfriend.zzz.and i even got teased by my brother for still being single when im the oldest.argh.though it feels weird,but i guess its just cos we're all grown ups alr,so now we talk more on personal stuffs ba.hahas.looking at my brother,i feel quite relieved cos he's able to read and write now,and he has in mind wad he wants to do in the future.this is weird.but he says HE WANTS TO BE A BAKER OR CHEF.just like shamane.maybe 10yrs down the road,both of them will be able to open a bakery? hahas.totally unimaginable..
haix.A levels is nearing.mug hard ppl! all the best=)
A light shining through
You're barely waking
And I'm tangled up in you
Yeah
I'm open, you're closed
Where I follow, you'll go
I worry I won't see your face
Light up again
Even the best fall down sometimes
Even the wrong words seem to rhyme
Out of the doubt that fills my mind
I somehow find
You and I collide
I'm quiet you know
You make a first impression
I've found I'm scared to know I'm always on your mind
Even the best fall down sometimes
Even the stars refuse to shine
Out of the back you fall in time
I somehow find
You and I collide
Don't stop here
I've lost my place
I'm close behind
Even the best fall down sometimes
Even the wrong words seem to ryhme
Out of the doubt that fills your mind
You finally find
You and I collide
You finally find
You and I collide
You finally find
You and I collide
isnt it just totally awesome that we get to know many different ppl in different stages of our lives and how dear they all turn out to be? graduation day always brings back many wonderful and precious memories.many many.
i can still rmb the day when i graduated from kindergarten.i rmb how mdm fatimah cried with my class.
and the day when i graduated from primary school.though im not exactly in touch with my friends now,but we'll still rmb each other and say hi when we meet each other.
i can still rmb graduating from PHS.the phototaking sessions and service..and my pals who are still standing close by me now.
well.WOW! 2 yrs in TJ is gone just like that.these 2 yrs seemed to pass really fast.though short,im still really touched to have known a great bunch of friends.they're just simply wonderful cos i wouldnt have enjoyed my time in school if its not for them.
simply love my teammates, classmates and my beloved clique lots and lots=)
oh dear.im already missing everyone.missing all the times spent with the team and class.it got me thinking if anyone will still think of me a few yrs down the road.i'll always try to bring joy to others..and i wonder if anyone will rmb me and miss me for that.hahas.actually i doubt so.thats why i was pretty upset that day.but nvm lah.i guess all good things will eventually come to an end.including wonderful friendships=( well.sometimes when i say im fine,i really wish that someone would look me in the eyes and ask me to tell the truth.
my brother can come out each sunday from now on.last sunday,i spent the whole day with my siblings.for the very first time,without our parents ard.went to buy stuffs for my brother and had KFC tgt.terence has grown alot.he's even taller than me now and his voice has changed too.we talked abt many things that we've nv talked abt before.and i was imagining how touched my parents would feel looking at us,cos we've all grown up alr.shamane kept talking abt her boyfriend.zzz.and i even got teased by my brother for still being single when im the oldest.argh.though it feels weird,but i guess its just cos we're all grown ups alr,so now we talk more on personal stuffs ba.hahas.looking at my brother,i feel quite relieved cos he's able to read and write now,and he has in mind wad he wants to do in the future.this is weird.but he says HE WANTS TO BE A BAKER OR CHEF.just like shamane.maybe 10yrs down the road,both of them will be able to open a bakery? hahas.totally unimaginable..
haix.A levels is nearing.mug hard ppl! all the best=)
Saturday, October 11, 2008
BAD DAY =(
i went hm on wed.and really felt better thr.all thks to my dogs=) i din have a really pleasant lunch.cos i really dun uds why ppl always have to accuse others of things they din even have the intention to do so.I DIN LIE.
but anw,reaching hm made things much better.spent lots of time with my beloved dogs,and my mum.i haven seen her for mths..took lots of pics of my doggies.and i took them for a walk with my mum.
this is mummy with hildas.
and nobel with me=) oh man! she looks like a cute little bunny!
then i had dinner with my sis,mum and grandma.oh.shamane din have dinner with us cos she went out with her boyfriend.mm.i din know that everyone knew abt her relationship alr.but it seems like mummy likes him too ba.
then its phototaking time!!!
this is nobel on her favourite cushion..
this is hildas on his favourite cushion(me!)
i wonder wad he's looking at.
nobel looks simply adorable!
this basket used to be miko's.but..oh well.nobel took over it now.
doesnt she look really cute??
hildas slping beside me=)
ah! cramps are giving me lots of probs these few mths.couldnt do much except rolling in bed the whole day=(
but anw,i went for lunch with my classmates.had quite alot of fun.cos there's very few chances lately for us to gather like this,joke ard and so on..but i felt quite sad instead.dunno why.
i felt lost.like i had lots of stuffs to say.but dunno who to tell anymore.if someone could stop,and realise that im not alright.if only anyone could pay a little more attention to me.and realise that i dun like all these.
and my brother can come out this sunday.i heard from my dad that perhaps he can come out every sunday after this.but he's not sure abt it yet.i haven seen him for 7 mths alr.actually i dunno wad to say,wad to do that day.and im very scared that i'll break down suddenly.i dun wanna cry in front of him.I DUN WANNA CRY AT ALL ALR.FROM NOW ONWARDS.haix.bad time of the mth agn ba.i dunno why.but i feel that my close ones are leaving me slowly,one by one.
oh dear! 22 days to A LEVELS!! jiayou!!
but anw,reaching hm made things much better.spent lots of time with my beloved dogs,and my mum.i haven seen her for mths..took lots of pics of my doggies.and i took them for a walk with my mum.
this is mummy with hildas.
and nobel with me=) oh man! she looks like a cute little bunny!
then i had dinner with my sis,mum and grandma.oh.shamane din have dinner with us cos she went out with her boyfriend.mm.i din know that everyone knew abt her relationship alr.but it seems like mummy likes him too ba.
then its phototaking time!!!
this is nobel on her favourite cushion..
this is hildas on his favourite cushion(me!)
i wonder wad he's looking at.
nobel looks simply adorable!
this basket used to be miko's.but..oh well.nobel took over it now.
doesnt she look really cute??
hildas slping beside me=)
ah! cramps are giving me lots of probs these few mths.couldnt do much except rolling in bed the whole day=(
but anw,i went for lunch with my classmates.had quite alot of fun.cos there's very few chances lately for us to gather like this,joke ard and so on..but i felt quite sad instead.dunno why.
i felt lost.like i had lots of stuffs to say.but dunno who to tell anymore.if someone could stop,and realise that im not alright.if only anyone could pay a little more attention to me.and realise that i dun like all these.
and my brother can come out this sunday.i heard from my dad that perhaps he can come out every sunday after this.but he's not sure abt it yet.i haven seen him for 7 mths alr.actually i dunno wad to say,wad to do that day.and im very scared that i'll break down suddenly.i dun wanna cry in front of him.I DUN WANNA CRY AT ALL ALR.FROM NOW ONWARDS.haix.bad time of the mth agn ba.i dunno why.but i feel that my close ones are leaving me slowly,one by one.
oh dear! 22 days to A LEVELS!! jiayou!!
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