i feel really useless.and selfish.i haven teared so much in a while alr.

sometimes i think im not to blame.i was so young then.how to take care of you?
but thinking back,i think i could have done a much better job.we were left on our own when we were young.you were only 2.i hated home.i din like to talk to you guys.i found you all really annoying.
IF ONLY i was patient and nice,IF i cared more,you wont turn out this way.

i knew that you were turning bad.but i thot it was nth much,you would change after a while.so i simply shouted at you a couple of times and ignored you after that.
you din change.you got worse.


the first time i visited you at the hm,i cried uncontrollably even before meeting you.i dunno why.i saw that you had changed.and the kiss you gave me,and the way you called me...i wont forget.

when you first got your hm leave,you really became very sensible,polite and no longer impatient.why did you change now agn? why cant you learn? when will you start thinking?

i know its tough being by yourself.there will be ppl who dislike you and purposely pick on you.why,wont you talk to me?

i wanted to hug you just now,but not to stop you from running.when i lost you for that while,i felt really helpless.i dunno what will happen to you,and why were you doing all these?

when i saw you cry,i felt how much you wanted to be free,and how upset you were after being wronged.i felt how much you wanted to be forgiven,but no one gave you the chance.thats why you could turn back,but sink deeper.

you know you can trust us.you know mummy loves you.so do we.you know we'll be on your side.ask yourself,how many times have you done wrong? have we stopped trusting you? have we stopped standing by your side? you know we din.you know you're not the only one suffering,we're all going thru all these with you.when will you turn back?


pls.let him learn and change.love him,protect him and change him.